The secret to a good partnership, any partnership, be it a marriage, an enduring lifelong friendship or a business partnership, is to capture the opportunity for greater understanding through the door of conflict. My thirty-year-old son told me the other day, “Relationships are hard, Mom. While you and Dad had conflict in your relationship and […]
Hollywood and the Dance of False Intimacy
Engracia Gill; January 2017 I was watching a romantic comedy, “Blind Date” on Netflix this last weekend. The movie happens to actually be a French movie. The story, of course, applied the classic formula of “boy meets girl, boy/girl breaks up with boy/girl and boy/girl make up and are happily together forever more”. This movie […]
Disentangle from Hard Emotions with Your Partner
The next time you get into a spat with a loved one, be it your child, your spouse or your parent, you might remember the three S,S,S for soft, simple and slow! When caught in the tangle of a disagreement, we, human being, resort to hard emotions. It is the way we are wired, we […]
Lifting the Dark Shadow of the “Locker Room” Behavior
It can happen anywhere… on the bus, in church. It can happen with anybody… a teacher, a boss, an uncle… It can be a wandering hand or a naked stare at our chest… I had an experience recently and it caught my heart. I belong to a woman’s choir, a kind of “Red Tent” gathering […]
Catch it before it is too late: CPR for couples
Is it possible to revive the heart of a marriage just like you can revive a heart that does not beat? It is possible. Timing, attunement and openness are all qualities that become essential in restoring vitality into a relationship in trouble. Just as with CPR, timing is essential. With CPR, a heart stops and […]